Relationships Information

What Every Woman Should Know About Men and Romance


Men and women think differently about romance.

Men are goal-oriented. They measure their success by their achievement. Unconsciously, they tend to divide their relationship into two phases - courtship and 'Keepership'.

The aim of courtship is to woo the woman and win her affection. During the courtship, he is the hunter while she is the hunted. During the hunt, he can be wonderfully charming, thoughtful and sensitive. He attends to her every whim and fancy. He is sensitive to her feelings and needs. He pays great attention to every detail. He will go to great length to please her. If necessary, he will climb the highest mountain, swim the widest river, and bungee jump, just for her. He may send flowers or a loving note after a romantic date.

But once her heart is captured, the courtship is over. When the hunt is over, so is romance. When he senses the woman cares for him, he changes. His victory is assured. Having captured her heart, she is like a trophy for keeps.

Women tend to be different. They want romance to continue; they are disappointed when it ceases. Women often feel shortchanged by men when romantic behavior fades. Women complain that men take them for granted.

For most men, romance is a means to an end; to many women, romance is an end in itself. Most men don't feel discomfort with romance; they love it. Guess who read romantic novels - the women of course!

Men, on the other hand, are anxious to get over with the pursuit so that they can stop worrying, relax and enjoy the rewards of victory. While women tend to equate pursuit with love, men often equate not having to pursue with love. Having possessed her love, he can stop pursuing her.

Before marriage, men often declare their undying love with the magic words, "I love you." But after marriage, they hardly utter those words. The excuse men gave is that they have not changed their mind since they declared their undying love at the altar; and if he ever changes his mind, he would tell her. They feel they don't have to remind her that 'I love you' everyday.

What a dilemma for the women! Is there any hope for romance? Of course there are. A committed relationship need not be without romance and passion.

If a woman wants her man to be romantic, here are some things she can do.

Do not hassle him to buy you presents, bring you flowers or accompany you for shopping. Men do not like to be told what to do. If you keep nagging him, you will probably succeed in making him feel pressured and guilty, but you are not going to get him to feel more romantic. Even if he dutifully gives in and brings home a dozen roses from the florist, it will probably be mere compliance. Romance has to come from the heart, not out of obligation. The smart woman knows that compliance is an enemy of romance. Let him feel it is his ideas, not yours.

Simply allow him to enjoy being loved. Interpret his diminished need to be romantic as a compliment, as a hallmark of his trust in you. He is assured of your love. You are safely in his fold. Therefore he does not feel the need to woo you and to remind you of his love for you.

Understand the psychology of men. Do the unexpected. Reward him occasionally. Keep him in suspense. To be predictable is to be boring. Be unpredictable. Men enjoy the chase. Put him in a competition so that he will not take you for granted. Be vague. The uncertainty stimulates him, motives him to re-embark on the romantic chase; it drives him wild.

Remember, for men, romance is a goal-oriented behavior, a time when they are uncertain of a woman's feeling towards them. The key word is uncertainty. When men are uncertain, they become more romantic.

Tim Robinson is the owner of http://www.singlesgold.com. If you're looking for romance, friendship or just some fun, SinglesGold.com is a great place to start!


MORE RESOURCES:

Gay Matchmaker Responds to eHarmony's Entry Into LGBT Market
MarketWatch - 2 hours ago
"eHarmony has an impressive track record of helping heterosexual couples find meaningful relationships," said Patrick Perrine, the Founder and CEO of the ...


Analysis: It's About Building Relationships
BusinessWeek - 5 hours ago
"With respect to the AXA site, the strategy of providing offerings and services that help the financial institutions develop stronger relationships with ...


Restore peace in relationships
Victoria Advocate, TX - 7 hours ago
A lot of wonderful things can happen when two people come together in a relationship. But it's also true that whenever imperfect human beings start forming ...


Examiner.com

Relationships in the news: Jennifer Garner fears stalker
Examiner.com - 20 hours ago
by Debra Collins, Relationship Examiner Actress Jennifer Garner was granted a three year restraining order today for herself, her husband Ben Affleck, ...


Telegraph.co.uk

Know which relationships count
Minneapolis Star Tribune, MN - Nov 19, 2008
Good for Tom Friedman, the St. Louis Park kid who grew up to become a topnotch New York Times columnist and author, for paying attention to the relationship ...
Video: Hillary Will Get SOS Nom Soon CBS
Clinton accepts offer to become secretary of state, sources say Blast
GOP applauds Hillary as potential secretary of state Newsday
The Associated Press - New York Magazine
all 5,177 news articles


Under the microscope Why do mothers in bad relationships feel even ...
guardian.co.uk, UK - 3 hours ago
Whether they were depressed, and the quality of the relationship with their partner, were measured. Depression levels were reassessed again 12 months later, ...


Anixter International Inc. Comments on Customer Bankruptcy
MarketWatch - 15 hours ago
A current assessment of our key customer relationships shows this situation to be unique in terms of the circumstances and relative size of the exposure. ...
Anixter to take charge on customer bankruptcy Chicago Tribune
Anixter International Inc. Comments on Customer Bankruptcy International Business Times
all 21 news articles


Plenty of past relationships in Apple Cup
SportingNews.com - Nov 20, 2008
SEATTLE (AP) -- Cody Bruns used to get grief as a kid growing up in southeastern Washington. Smack in the middle of Cougar country, Bruns would proudly wear ...


SafePlace awared $1M grant to promote safe teen relationships
Bizjournals.com, NC - Nov 20, 2008
SafePlace has been awarded a grant of up to $1 million from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation for a program that promotes healthy, safe teen relationships. ...
$18 Million Dollar Initiative to Prevent Intimate Partner Violence PNN
Boston gets $1 million to prevent teen violence Boston Globe (registration)
all 6 news articles


Better family relationships goal of Placerville program
Sacramento Bee,  USA - 10 hours ago
By Cathy Locke By Cathy Locke "Parenting from the Heart" workshops, designed to help parents improve their relationship with their children, will be offered ...

Relationships - Google News

Home | Site Map| Link Partners

Powered By: Free Google Adsense Websites!

© 2006